Mothers Of Lost Children – Indiana

Support for Noncustodial Indiana Moms

Archive for the ‘Indiana’ Category

Other States are Starting to Realize the Full Impact of Domestic Violence, Indiana Needs to Also

leave a comment »

This is from another friend and fellow advocate Dara Carlin from Hawaii. Sorry for the short notice, but this is happening today. It will be televised at 5:35 pm Eastern Daylight Time today, and you can watch it on the internet at the link below. Many Indiana state legislators fail to realize the full impact of domestic violence in this state, including courts giving child custody to abusers. We need to have an event like this also in Indiana.

 

 

Media AdvisoryHawaii House of Representatives

June 20, 2011 – For Immediate Release

Contact: Office of Rep. John Mizuno, Telephone: 808-586-6050, Cell: 808-741-0639

 

LAWMAKERS TO HOLD BRIEFING ON DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND HEAR CONCERNS FROM DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SURVIVORS AND DISCUSS THE NEED FOR POLICY CHANGE

 

Several domestic violence survivors will share their story of how they lost custody of their child(ren) to the abuser, even after a finding of domestic violence by the abuser

 

WHAT:            The House Human Services Chairman, Rep. John Mizuno, will hold a legislative briefing to address domestic violence in Hawaii.  Rep. Mizuno will identify certain concerns involving specific failures of the current “system” in adequately addressing domestic violence.  Rep. Mizuno will also be hearing from domestic violence victims, survivor advocates, and agencies working directly with domestic violence victims, issuing protective orders and temporary restraining orders.

The briefing will:

• Identify and address concerns regarding domestic violence in Hawaii

• Explain the reason for the various bills which seek to provide greater protection for domestic violence victims

• Explain the difficulties in passing measures which seek to improve the state’s system in handling domestic violence cases

WHEN:            Tuesday, June 21, 2011 – 11:35 a.m. Hawaii Standard Time (Televised in Hawaii on Ch. 53, for Neighbor Island residents and nationwide go to the internet www.olelo.org – click NATV Ch. 53 for online live stream coverage)

WHERE:           Hawaii State Capitol, Room 329

WHY:               Rep. Mizuno was contacted by several survivors of domestic violence who will be sharing their stories with lawmakers during the briefing. According to Rep. Mizuno, “It is extremely concerning to hear that time after time the abusers who beat our victims, many times end up gaining custody of the children.  Based on our victims’ testimonies and information provided by organizations and advocates for domestic violence victims, I believe our current system has many major flaws in properly addressing domestic violence issues.  Therefore, I am looking for solid solutions to better address domestic violence statewide at the conclusion of this briefing.”

Advertisements

Sex Offenders Reveal Sick Secrets: Will it Matter to Family Court Judges in Indiana?

leave a comment »

Whenever a child or a mother reports child sexual abuse in Indiana, if there is a child custody case involved, it will be systematically ignored.  By everyone.  Not too long ago in a case in Marion County, someone from Carl Brizzi’s Prosecutors Office said they believed the evidence of sexual abuse against a young girl by her father, but said they wouldn’t do anything about it since it was in family court.

An employee for the Marion County Prosecutor’s office, who has to remain anonymous, believes Kay’s story is legitimate, but could not take action due to the custody dispute.

WTF?

From WRTV-6:

MUNCIE, Ind. — A handful of convicted sex offenders spoke frankly to 100 strangers Wednesday night in Muncie, with no questions off limits. The workshop was a first-of-its-kind event put on by the Family Services Society to prevent future abuse, 6News’ Tanya Spencer reported.

As offenders spoke candidly about the crimes that put them in jail, two of the panelists said they assaulted young girls they had just met. One abused his own daughter and another was a church mentor.

The offenders talked about how they justified their actions in their minds.  “I moan and gripe and complain about the children that are wearing pants that’s got “sexy” (written) on the back. Why do you want to put a word on your 12-, 14- or 16-year-old daughter’s butt? I mean, is that not trying to draw attention to her?” said one sex offender, who met his teenage victim online. He blamed pornography for fueling his addiction to sex.

All of the panelists agreed that they thought only of their own gratification during their crimes, never about the effect on their victims.  Parents came to the workshop looking for answers.  “(I want) to see how these folks operate and get insight to see where I can stand to protect my own children,” said Dwight Martin, a father of a 5-year-old.”  (I wanted) to make sure that I know what to look for to keep my kids safe,” said Brandy Martin, Dwight’s wife.”

I have three little children. I have a 4-year-old, a 1-year-old and a 3-month-old. That’s my worst fear ever is that something awful like that could happen to them,” said parent Sandrina Saintignon.

Counselors with the Family Services Society said unfortunately there’s no known set of characteristics or personality traits that will help parents identify an offender. They also said that 90 percent of sexual abuse is committed by someone the victim knows and trusts.

The best advice from those who know best how to lure young victims is to talk to and listen to kids.  Let them know they’re loved unconditionally and that they can share anything with you.  Also, pay close attention to any change in their behavior.

“It (the sexual abuse) changed how she (his 13-year-old daughter) acted towards me,” said one offender, “So, if you see a change toward a family member or friend, pay attention to it. Ask questions.

“Experts said one in three girls and one in six boys will be molested in their lifetime.Experts also said 88 percent of sexual abuse cases are never reported.  The Family Services Society has done panels like Wednesday’s before for small groups, but this was the first that was open to the public.  Event organizers said they may offer more sessions in the future.

Please Join Us For Another Rally in Washington D.C., February 13th and 14th

with one comment

Less than two weeks to go!  Remember, there is a meeting the evening of the 13th at the hostel where many are staying.  For information on the hostel…click here.

For Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Wouldn’t it be Wonderful if Indiana TV Stations Ran PSAs that Mean Something

with one comment

Here are new Public Service Announcements (PSAs) that were produced for the Center for Judicial Excellence.  Does any station in Indiana have the guts to run these?  It is time the public knew the truth.

MOTHERS ALERT: Indianapolis Father’s Rights Lawyers Work to Discredit You

leave a comment »

Watch out for these folks in Indianapolis: Schembs Sweeney. If they are on your ex’s side, they may be up to some shenanigans, or may have a “special relationship” with your judge. Here is a screen shot of their website:

Abusers typically scream about “false allegations.”   However, from the American Bar Association’s 10 Myths About Custody and Domestic Violence and How to Counter Them, it is noted:


The courts of Marion County typically disregard claims of domestic violence, and even when accepted, don’t care and hand the children to the abuser anyway (this ALSO being noted on the ABA report).  Download the ABA document and MAKE YOUR LAWYER READ IT.  Most lawyers in Indianapolis won’t care, but this is the lives of your children on the line. Do everything you can to document your case, including hospital reports, tape recordings, pictures, witnesses, anything you can.  If it wasn’t for Mel Gibson’s girlfriend Oksana having a tape recorder running, she wouldn’t have caught the vicious rant which included “I want my child, and no one will believe you” as Gibson raged about the attacks he made on her.

Take care of yourself and your children.  The lawyers and judges in Indianapolis won’t.

What an Amazing Vigil at the White House on Mother’s Day

leave a comment »

Mothers of children being taken and given to abusers and rapists are tired of not being heard.  We won’t shut up, we won’t go away!  Here’s a video someone made that has some pictures from the vigil.  It’s awesome!

For the love of our children…


Vodpod videos no longer available.

April 25th is Abusers Awareness Day: Learn the Truth About Parental Alienation Syndrome

with 2 comments

In 1985, PAS was first described by Richard Gardner, a psychiatrist who wrote that adults having sex with children is not a bad thing.[1]

Gardner described PAS as a “syndrome” whereby vengeful mothers employed child abuse allegations as a powerful weapon to punish ex-husbands and ensure custody to themselves.[2] He further theorized that such protective parents enlisted the children in their “campaign of denigration” and “vilification” of the abuser, that they often “brainwashed” or “programmed” the children into believing untrue claims of abuse by the father, and that the children then fabricated and contributed their own stories.[3]

To distance themselves from the discredited theory and its embarrassing originator, proponents of Parental Alienation Awareness Day sometimes claim that Parental Alienation Syndrome and parental alienation are different.  In reality, they are often used synonymously and the consequences can be dire.  Children can end up in the custody of their abusers.

Since 1985, abusers have come to convince family courts to ignore children’s allegations of abuse by invoking parental alienation and Parental Alienation Syndrome.  They wrongly claim that mothers are to blame because they are brainwashing their children.

PAS WIDELY DISCREDITED

1996 – The Report of the American Psychological Association Presidential Task Force on Violence and the Family discredited the theory. It stated:

Although there are no data to support the phenomenon called parental alienation syndrome, in which protective parents are blamed for interfering with their children’s attachment to their abusers, the term is still used by some evaluators and courts to discount children’s fears in hostile and psychologically abusive situations.[4] Family courts often do not consider the history of violence between the parents in making custody and visitation decisions. . . . Psychological evaluators not trained in domestic violence may contribute to this process by ignoring or minimizing the violence and by giving inappropriate pathological labels to women’s responses to chronic victimization. Terms such as “parental alienation” may be used to blame the women for the children’s reasonable fear of or anger toward their violent abuser.[5]

2003 – The National District Attorneys Association’s Center for Prosecution of Child Abuse discredited the theory. It stated:

Although PAS may be hailed as a “syndrome” . . . in fact it is the product of anecdotal evidence gathered from Dr. Gardner’s own practice. […] PAS is based primarily upon two notions, neither of which has a foundation in empirical research. […] PAS is an untested theory that, unchallenged, can have far-reaching consequences for children seeking protection and legal vindication in courts of law.”[6]

2006 – The American Bar Association’s Children’s Legal Rights Journal discredited the theory. It stated:

PAS’s twenty-year run in American courts is an embarrassing chapter in the history of evidentiary law. It reflects the wholesale failure of legal professionals entrusted with evidentiary gate-keeping intended to guard legal processes from the taint of pseudo-science…. As a matter of science, law, and policy PAS should remain inadmissible in American courts.[7]


2006 – The
National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges also discredited the theory. It stated:

The discredited “diagnosis” of “PAS” (or allegation of “parental alienation”), quite apart from its scientific invalidity, inappropriately asks the court to assume that the children’s behaviors and attitudes toward the parent who claims to be “alienated” have no grounding in reality. It also diverts attention away from the behaviors of the abusive parent, who may have directly influenced the children’s responses by acting in violent, disrespectful, intimidating, humiliating and/or discrediting ways toward the children themselves, or the children’s other parent.[8]

CONSEQUENCES

One of the most troubling consequences of Gardner’s theory is that, “PAS shifts attention away from the perhaps dangerous behaviour of the parent seeking custody to that of the custodial parent. This person, who may be attempting to protect the child, is instead presumed to be lying and poisoning the child.”[9]

As a result, some children placed in the custody of their abusers have committed suicide; others have run away, and countless others have endured the abuse and are permanently traumatized. In recent years, children placed in custody of their abusers have been coming forward to tell their stories and to warn of the danger surrounding the fictitious syndrome.[10]


[1] www.stopfamilyviolence.org/373

[2] Gardner, 1992a; 1992b

[3] (Gardner, 1992b, p. 162, 193; 2002, pp. 94-95). – Meier, J. (2009, January). Parental Alienation Syndrome and Parental Alienation: Research Reviews. Harrisburg, PA: VAWnet, a project of the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence/Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Retrieved 3/10/2009, from: http://www.vawnet.org

[4] Pg 40

[5] Pg 100

[6] http://www.ndaa.org/publications/newsletters/update_volume_16_number_6_2003.html

[7] http://www.stopfamilyviolence.org/media/Hoult_PAS_admissibility.pdf

[8] http://www.stopfamilyviolence.org/media/NCFCJ%20guidebook%20final_2006.pdf

[9] Bruch, Carol S., Parental Alienation Syndrome and Parental Alienation: getting It Wrong in Child Custody Case in Child and Family Law Quarterly, Vol 14, No 4, 2002: 384.

[10] http://www.courageouskids.net